Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Changes

The days do pass so quickly, one day you’re a child playing here and there not having worries or cares except about your toys and all of a sudden you are a mother worrying and working to make everything as perfect as possible for your children and your partner and thereby your own self.

Being a mother is a wonderful thing. Even if you know that many of your efforts are not recognized as they should be, but the one thing you know for sure is Allah knows and hears and therefore it is all worthwhile.

May Allah grant us patience and strength to always be better mothers and wives to produce useful and decent men and women for this world.

On January 1st, 2003, I was blessed with my first son, Omar. It was a lovely, sunny and warm day. My hospital room was bright with light from the sun and I could see the blue sky, just the way I like it. When I woke up from the anesthesia I found myself in an even lovelier, brighter and more colorful room with a lovely view as well and I was blessed with a lovely baby boy who smiled at me the second the nurse put him by my side. I cannot forget that moment when she placed him next to me and he smiled at me. I was very dizzy, my eyes blurry and in so much pain from the stitches but I made and effort to lift my head to have a good look at him. That smile was my pain killer. It was really “The loveliest smile” God had me witness and it sure made me feel that whatever pain I am going through it was truly worth it.

Now Omar is three years, 3 months and nineteen days old. I am almost nine weeks pregnant now and my due date insha’Allah should be beginning of November since I will be delivering by c-section.

That is the newest I have about me and I really wanted to share my happiness as I did my sorrows recently with you my friends.

I prayed and asked Allah so many times for the right timing and sub7an Allah, this for me is the ideal time to get pregnant and for the difference between Omar and this baby to be alright. If God wills and every thing goes well the difference between them will be three years and eleven month since my expected due date is early November.

Ever since I found out I am pregnant the days have become so long and time passes by so slowly. I cannot wait to feel the baby move about inside me.

I had an ultra sound and saw the baby’s heart beats, it was still not a clear image of a formed body but the heart and its beats were visible and that was lovely. Baby was still too tiny. I do pray all goes well till the end insha’Allah.

I know all of u have lovely hearts… Please do wish the baby well and me with it. Do pray God grants the baby a normal and healthy growth. I do not have any preferences for the baby’s sex. Please pray with me for a healthy baby and a safe delivery… And pray for me to be able to balance things and not make Omar feel at all left out or that some other baby came and took his place. I constantly pray for Allah to grant me the wisdom of action and saying with Omar. I love him so much and lately have become extra attached to him.

I am telling myself Insha’Allah things will go well. With Allah’s kindness and mercy, your prayers and mine, Insha’Allah all will go well.